


ljubav i hranu (tell me what you eat and i'll tell you who you are)

by wintersend



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Mutual Pining, Never Have I Ever, Serbia - Freeform, Shipping, Social Media, That's right I went there, author pretends she's know what she's talking about, food travel au, jyn is pissed, their friends are NOT helpful
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-30
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-07-20 21:35:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,058
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16145996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wintersend/pseuds/wintersend
Summary: In continuation of the infamous Food Travel AU, the crew travels to Serbia, celebrate the Orthodox New Year, and Jyn and Cassian find more excuses to NOT kiss each other. OR:She knows how this goes. She knows they’ll be teased and egged on, and she know she’ll spend the whole time pretending it’s fine. It’s not fine but it's the way it always goes.“Sure,” Cassian says and Jyn nods because she knows there’s no getting out of it.“Cool. We can hit up some pub, get drunk, watch the fireworks. Unless you guys have other plans?”One of these days, she decides, she’s going to punch one of them.





	ljubav i hranu (tell me what you eat and i'll tell you who you are)

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be real, I am _terrible _with settings so this is definitely more character focused. I love Serbia very much since it's my birthplace but I haven't actually been in Belgrade since... well, I don't even know, I was very young. I considered setting this in Subotica, a city I'm actually familiar with, but the capital seemed like the most logical choice for the crew to visit. So atmosphere and the little technical details are based on either my experiences in Subotica, research, or my own parents' memories from over 30 years ago. Hopefully, they're not too off.__
> 
>  
> 
> __  
> _Title means "love and food" which is certainly not very creative but oh well._  
>   
> 

They arrive in Belgrade on a drizzly January afternoon, the weather much cooler than it was in Greece. Jyn pulls her coat closer around herself and Cassian wears his blue puffy parka that she admires from a distance. The rest of the crew seem to be bundled up tight as well.

While discussing their schedule as they make their way outside, Kay takes the chance to point out that they arrived just a day before Serbia celebrates Orthodox New Year’s Eve on January 13th. That makes Kes stop in his tracks.

“New Year’s Eve is New Year’s Eve. How are they celebrating it on a different date?”

“Time is a man-made concept,” Jyn chimes in, partly just to see Kay throw an unimpressed glare in her direction because he’s annoyed she’s right.

“That’s correct. According to the Julian calendar, which is still used by the church, the Old New Year falls on January 14th. However, the majority of the population do celebrate the Gregorian New Year’s Eve on December 31st in what you and the rest of the world traditionally recognize as the official New Year’s Eve.”

“Yes, thank you, Kay,” Cassian interrupts with a pointed look and Jyn smirks.

She leans closer to him to whisper conspiratorially, “Does he just know all these things?”

Cassian shrugs, matching her tone. “He knows a lot. Or he just googled it. Maybe both.” He pauses. “Probably both.”

They grin at each other for a moment – until Kes coughs, and she realizes they were lost in their own little world again. Jyn quickly looks away and focuses her attention on Kes who looks a little too smug for his own good.

Things between her and Cassian are okay but fragile. The acknowledgement of their mutual attraction is weird. Their co-workers pushing them together is weird. Complete strangers on the internet rooting for them is weird. (And yes, she’s seen the comments, varying from sweet and encouraging to creepy and uncomfortable. It’s not like she went out of her way to read them but it was hard not to notice.)

It’s a lot of pressure, and on top of her very real feelings for Cassian, she doesn’t know what to do with it. She just knows she doesn’t like the thought that it’s for the show and not for them.

And the show hasn’t even aired yet.

“So two New Year’s Eve? That’s dope. Maybe we could celebrate too,” Kes grins and Jyn already hates where this is going. She barely made it through actual New Year’s Eve two weeks ago.

Everyone had been excited for a chance to party it up, and Jyn had been looking forward to relax a little, but she should have known it would result in a lot of drunkenness and lack of inhibition. Shara taunted her to kiss Cassian at the countdowns, (like she needed a reason to obsess over it) and she snappily told her to get back to her when she kissed Kes. That shut her up.

“If there are fireworks, I’m down,” Shara agrees and Kes turns back to the two of them.

“Jyn? Cassian?”

She knows how this goes. She knows they’ll be teased and egged on, and she know she’ll spend the whole time pretending it’s fine. It’s not fine but it’s the way it always goes.

“Sure,” Cassian says and Jyn nods because she knows there’s no getting out of it.

“Cool. We can hit up some pub, get drunk, watch the fireworks. Unless you guys have other plans?”

One of these days, she decides, she’s going to punch one of them, and the likely candidate is Kes. Though she can see Luke from the corner of her eye, grinning as well, but he’s too much of a puppy. She’s grateful that Kay, at least, doesn’t needle them.

Jyn doesn’t answer, just pushes forward to walk beside Shara as they exit the airport. During the drive to the hotel, Cassian ends up in the other taxi, and she doesn’t know if she’s disappointed or relieved.

* * *

The hotel seems plain from the outside but the rooms are homely enough, the interior simple but warm. Jyn shares a room with Shara but is quickly left alone when she steps out to explore the city with Kes. Jyn throws herself on the bed, the mattress bouncing under her, grateful for a little quiet. Traveling so much has started to wear her down but the places they get to visit are worth it.

She pulls out her phone to check the time, doing some quick calculations in her head to decide that Bodhi should be awake by now, then decides to Skype him. They haven’t had the chance to video call since New Year’s Eve when she had been feeling a bit down. It was the first time in years that she spent the holidays without him and it felt strange.

Bodhi picks up, blearily blinking into the camera, a cup of coffee next to him on the kitchen counter. Looks like she’s caught him just waking up.

“Morning, sunshine,” Jyn thrills, a shit-eating grin on her face. Bodhi mumbles something incoherent under his breath, lifting the mug to his face.

“It’s early, Jyn,” he says after taking a sip, and she turns fake sympathetic eyes on him.

“I’ve been up since half past five.”

Bodhi shudders dramatically and Jyn laughs at him, but she’s not really a morning person either. Back at 5.30, protectively grasping her cup of coffee, she felt like murdering anyone who even glanced her way.

“Sounds like a fun job,” he deadpans.

“Eh, it's not so bad,” she says, and she isn’t even thinking about Cassian, but that’s all it takes for Bodhi to break out in a grin. Jyn is already rolling her eyes, hackles raised. Was he just waiting for the opportunity to arise?

“Oh, yeah? I bet there are perks. Like a hot foreign co-worker with whom you have amazing chemistry.”

“Like visiting cool interesting cities,” she counters but it’s not like Cassian _isn’t_ a perk. Still, she loves her job, she loves what she’s doing, she appreciates the chance to travel around Europe, and it’s not because of Cassian. She knows Bodhi doesn’t mean anything by it, but at this point, she’s automatically on defense when Cassian is mentioned. The attention is overwhelming, especially for a private person like her.

Bodhi sobers quickly enough when he sees her face. “Sorry, Jynnie, you know I’m just teasing.”

“It’s fine,” she shrugs, waving a hand. “I’m just sick of the attention. They’re all over us, and your lucky dick comment didn’t help, by the way.” She glares at him here. “This isn’t supposed to be about me.”

Bodhi shrugs helplessly. “Well, they like you. That’s good, right?”

She groans and pulls a pillow over her face. They don’t _know_ her. She never wanted to be liked, and certainly not for something as frivolous as dating a guy. And they aren’t even dating, not really. (Not yet? She doesn’t know. They agreed not to pursue anything while they’re working together but she has no idea what happens after production is over.)

It seems like middle school stuff, (are they dating? are they not dating?) not something adults should have to deal with. Not what she wanted to talk about with Bodhi.

“Jyn?” he asks when she stays silent for several seconds. “I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

She pulls the pillow away from her face. What the hell, he’s her best friend. She might as well confide in him.

“He said he likes me,” she begins, tentative, the memory still making her heart beat faster in her chest, even if _like_ is… well, a middle school word.

Bodhi cuts in before she could continue, “Of course he likes you, I’ve seen the trailer!”

She gives him a look and decides not to comment. “But with the show, and the fans making it weird…”

“But not weird enough to not sleep in his room?” he asks, cheeky.

“It was one time and he slept in my room because –” she starts instinctively until she remembers that she’s pretty sure she didn’t tell Bodhi about that. “Hey, how do you know – are you still talking to Luke?”

“Oh, well… maybe?” A blush spreads across his face. “That’s not the point.”

She snorts under her breath. Flirting with Mara, chatting up her best friend… Who knew the boy had it in him?

She hides her face again when Bodhi continues looking at her expectantly. She hates this, hates talking about emotions, but she’s pretty sure Bodhi isn’t going to judge her. He’s the only one who is distant enough from the situation to give her an unbiased perspective.

“I just want to like him in peace,” she mumbles into her pillow. “I don’t want to feel like I _have_ to, for the show or for the fans.”

Which is dumb because she likes him, she’s liked him from the start, before this whole thing spiraled out of control, but it still feels a bit like they took away her choice. It’s terrible.

“What does he think?”

“I don’t know…” She pulls her face away, gives her friend a helpless look. “We didn’t really talk about it. But I don’t think he’s too comfortable with it either.”

“Just ignore it,” Bodhi shrugs, and really, she knows that’s the best thing she can do. But she’s a little scared Draven might try to use their newfound popularity to promote the show and she’s so not here for that.

“Yeah, that’s the idea,” Jyn mumbles, and jumps on the chance to change the topic, ask after how he’s been doing instead.

When they’re done chatting, Jyn lies in bed for a little longer, chewing her lip as she thinks. Her heart is pulling her out the door, across the hallway where Cassian and Kay are staying, but…

Oh, screw it. She stands up, stretching. They don’t have shooting scheduled until tomorrow but exploring the city a bit on their own is almost tradition now. She knows it might feed the rumors but she’ll be damned if she lets their co-workers’ needless meddling stop her from spending time with Cassian if she wants to.

So she gets her camera, knocks on Cassian’s door, and he immediately opens it, a smile on his face. Like he’s been waiting. For her.

Jyn’s heart lurches, barely able to make her muscles work to return the smile. She’s in so much trouble.

Belgrade is grey. Grey buildings, grey streets – she’s sure the winter weather isn’t helping but it’s still a lot of grey. Cassian, in his blue parka, seems vibrant next to the dull atmosphere, and Jyn muses that on camera, it makes him look like the center of the world. Which is not at all a bad thing.

Like he knows what she’s thinking, Cassian gives her an amused smile. “Did you know that Belgrade means the white city?” he asks, a hint of humor in his voice.

She did not and she’s sure he only knows from Kay. The man is like a lexicon sometimes but she’s getting used to it.

She snorts. “Ironic.”

If she’s being honest, she wouldn’t call it a traditionally beautiful city, but the more they explore, the more she has to admit that it has a certain charm. A cold unyielding charm, like a winter storm, jaded and sharp-edged.

Though street names are in Cyrillic by default, many of them are also displayed in English, and shops and restaurants seem to favor Latin letters. History bleeds off the walls of every destroyed building, every crumbling house, every ruin, like an ominous ever-present ghost. Cassian mentions, somewhat in awe, that the city has been destroyed over forty times. Yet Belgrade still stands, despite the tumultuous past, and Jyn finds herself drawn to that. It’s not pretty, not kind, but resolute. Strong. A bit like herself.

They follow their regular schedule by now: wander the streets, capture Cassian looking effortlessly gorgeous in the backdrop of the city, chat idly about everything and nothing. She takes shots of the Danube and the Sava, then of Cassian with the wind in his hair on the shore, looking pensively into the distance. She thinks those turn out particularly well.

Cassian repeats Kay’s list of places that could be interesting to visit, and Jyn momentarily feels bad, wondering if she’s keeping Cassian from spending time with his best friend.

“Maybe we should have invited him along,” she suggests carefully, as they walk side by side, even though she’s selfishly hoping he’ll contradict her. Kay third-wheeling them would ruin the mood –

Not that this is a date to ruin. _You need to get a grip, Erso,_ she tells herself, _this is professional._

“No, it’s okay,” Cassian reassures her, but the words sound carefully deliberate. “It’s our thing, right?”

Jyn doesn’t think they’re close enough yet to push the issue so she lets it go.

“Oh, yes,” she nods, then adds playfully, “Just let me know if you get sick of me.”

“Not possible,” he says without hesitation. Jyn misses a step besides him.

It’s the kind of thing that would be hard to misinterpret even if she didn’t know how he felt about her. But she does, he’s admitted it, and everything he says or does means twice as much now.

She likes what she's hearing very much.

When she looks up at him with wide eyes, he seems uncertain, even apologetic. Jyn gives him a faint smile, hoping to convey that she feels the same, that she can’t imagine growing bored of his presence either. She’s satisfied when his hesitant look fades and his lips quirk. They go on without a word, but the air between them feels warmer, and if she walks a little closer to him, he doesn’t mention it.

* * *

Taking Kay’s advice into consideration, they head towards Kalemegdan Fortress, a popular tourist attraction only twenty minutes from their hotel. Cassian, adorably, has a map in hand, but getting there is rather straightforward. Admission is free, and the Fortress is also home to a park which allows scenic views over Belgrade. It’s easy to see why tourists would flock to the place in hordes.

Jyn, too, is charmed by the mini town, the strollable ramparts, the architecture, the duck-under arches. There’s a lot to see: a stronghold turned into a museum, Orthodox churches, picturesque fountains, a planetarium, even tennis and basketball courts. They visit the tomb of Damad Ali Pasha, an Ottoman general from the 18th century, and admire the so-called “Roman well” which gives Cassian the shudders. (He doesn’t like heights, he admits a little sheepishly.) The bottom of the well is deep, barely visible, and the ambiance is more than a little eerie.

The whole place oozes history.

In contrast, Kalemegdan Park feels much more grounded in reality. Old men play chess on the various chess tables placed in the park, trees and small flower gardens decorate the sidewalk, and the high perch gives a stunning river view over the confluence of the Danube and the Sava.

The park is peaceful. With Cassian by her side, it’s almost easy to forget that they’re here to work, not stroll the pathways hand in hand like other couples. They stop to lean against the railing as they look out the view, and Jyn finds herself mesmerized by the glittering of the gentle waves as the sun hits the surface of the rivers. Quite a lovely sight.

She makes sure to capture the beauty of the place on camera, then sets aside her equipment to admire the park with her own two eyes. When she turns to look at Cassian, she’s surprised to find that he’s already looking at her, his dark eyes expressive and yearning. Whatever was on the tip of her tongue flies away.

He really shouldn’t look at her like that if he didn’t want to be kissed senseless.

“Enjoying the view?” she supplies weakly, heart hammering in her throat, and he nods but never takes his eyes off her. She has to, however, because the drumming noise in her head is starting to drown out all rational thought, and she doesn’t want to be arrested for public indecency in a foreign country while filming a food show.

She swallows, still feeling Cassian’s burning stare on her, demanding her attention. He has it – all of it. It’s some kind of torture to deny herself the thrill of him.

Moments like these, she’s really looking forward to finishing shooting.

* * *

On their way back from the Fortress, they pass through the pedestrianized Knez Mihailova Street, and Jyn takes the opportunity to film the elegant mansions and neoclassical buildings lining the way. On a whim, they stop at a pancake shop to reenergize themselves and fill their bellies with sweet, chocolate cream filled pancakes. Well, Jyn does, while Cassian experiments with some of the salty versions, like ham and cheese filled pancakes. Jyn, for her part, is content to stick with the classics. That’s why he’s the foodie, she supposes. But he offers her a taste, promising that it’s really good, and she would take him up on the offer, if she didn’t think it was too intimate.

She politely declines with the excuse that she’s too full but can’t help watching him eat his pancakes, hypnotized by his lips and the way his throat moves. She tries to be subtle but it’s anyone’s guess if she manages to pull it off, and part of her hopes he notices and feels just as worked up as she did at the Fortress.

“You’ve got something on the corner of your mouth,” she says as they finish up and shakes her head when he dabs the napkin at the wrong place. “No, the other side. Higher. No, lower. Oh, let me…”

Maybe she’s getting a little braver, a little flirtier, a little teasing on purpose, but she reaches out and wipes it for him with her finger. Her hand lingers for a second, gently strokes his skin even though the spot is gone, then pulls away with her heart beating in her throat. It took everything in her not to touch his lips, not to trace them with her fingertips, though she hasn’t taken her eyes off them. She wants to know if they are as kissable as they look.

When she finally looks up at Cassian, he looks gobsmacked. He doesn’t blush but the tips of his ears turn reddish, his eyes dark, and Jyn is pleased. Seeing the effect she has on him is intoxicating. It’s very hard not to smirk or tease him.

“Come on,” she says lightly, successfully hiding the storm of feelings raging inside her. “We’re not done sightseeing.”

* * *

 

Flanked by various bars, restaurants, shops, and among them, many international brands, Knez Mihailova Street seems to be a cultural center. It’s decidedly more vibrant and alive than the rest of the grey streets they passed through. People hurry by, on their phones, carrying shopping bags, and the insistent humming noise of the city fills the air: the chatter of students carrying schoolbags, the clinking of plates from restaurants, the laughter from coffee houses. Other tourists linger, snapping photos on their phones, and even Cassian takes a couple of pictures.

She even agrees to a few selfies with him, knowing it’ll stay between the two of them. It’s actually nice to have a couple of pictures that won’t be plastered all over social media. Cassian shows her the results, and as she looks at the goofy faces they made, she muses that they look great next to each other. Maybe that’s what everyone else sees.

She wonders how they look to bystanders. Save for the camera equipment, they’re just another couple, strolling through the city, spending a day together sightseeing. It’s oddly idyllic, and she admits that she could easily see herself doing this with Cassian for pleasure, not for work. The lines are more than a little blurry, as it is.

Knez Mihailova Street extends to Republic Square at the southern end, where Jyn and Cassian admire the Serbian National Museum, and the Prince Mihailo Monument standing just outside the building. It’s green and rusted, standing on a platform that depicts people dressed in various different costumes, and scenes from a history Jyn is not familiar with. As she stares up at the face of the statue, she can’t help thinking that the dark holes of his eyes and mouth give a particularly sinister vibe to the prince.

She bumps Cassian and nods towards the statue. “Cheery, huh?”

Cassian’s answering smile is just a small quirk of his lips but it’s there. They lock eyes for a second, and even in the eerie shadow of the statue staring down at them, Jyn wants to step closer, feel the warmth of his body, let herself fall into his orbit. She wants to kiss him, she always does, but she’d settle for so much less. She’d be content just to take his hand.

A long honking noise rings out and they spring apart. She hasn’t realized she actually stepped closer, and now she awkwardly steps away, trying not to fidget in frustration. It’s the third time today that they have a… moment. This abstinence thing is becoming a problem.

Luckily, they’re both experts at acting like nothing happened, so they continue down the street and pretend they don’t want to be closer.

* * *

One of their last stops is a bakery to buy dinner for everyone. They get a couple of cakes, strawberry and coconut flavored, something called pereca that looks like a long thin crispy pretzel, and the local favorite, burek. It’s a type of pastry made of thin flaky dough and traditionally filled with cottage cheese, but there are variations with ham or mushroom. It’s often consumed with yogurt so Jyn and Cassian stop by a local store as well, then end up buying various snacks too. Smoki, a type of puffed corn snack; chocolate bars, like Eurocrem blok, Bananko and Cipiripi; and Napolitanke, wafers. They eye some beers as well but they decide to leave the alcohol for tomorrow. There are international brands but they try to stay away from those in the name of trying out new things.

With plenty to go around for everyone, they head back to the hotel, then unload their loot as they gather in Kes and Luke’s room. Jyn tries the burek, as does the rest of the crew, and though she only eats half because it’s quite filling, the warm pastry and cottage cheese make a delicious combination. The snacks are alright; she finds the Eurocrem blok tooth-rottingly sweet, but Bananko (a chocolate bar filled with bananas, unsurprisingly) is pretty great, and Smoki quickly becomes a fan favorite among the group. It’s these small crunchy peanut flavored pieces, and it’s hard to stop snacking once you start. Kay can’t try it due to his allergy, but between everyone else, they quickly finish two packs.

Feeling like she can’t eat anymore without bursting, Jyn decides to put some distance between her and the snacks. She sits down next to Luke on the bed who also decided to remove himself from the feasting a while ago. Instinctively, she pulls up Instagram, while he types away on his phone as well, but in hindsight, it isn’t the smartest decision. She’s not used to the notifications. Even if it isn’t anything too crazy, she still has a lot more mentions than usual. Especially since the lucky dick comment from Bodhi, _thanks a lot, friend…_

The red angry number blinking at her is almost taunting. She has no idea what to do with it.

Quickly scrolling through the notifications, she frowns when she sees almost all of them are about her relationship with Cassian. Halfway through, she locks her phone with a frustrated sigh and throws it on the mattress.

Luke gives her a sympathetic glance but she’s not feeling too friendly when he’s one of the reasons this is even a thing.

Still, she needs to know –

“Jyssian?” she asks carefully. It’s one of the hashtags that caught her eye, mentioned multiple times, and she’s not sure what to make of it.

“Oh, you saw that? Yeah, it’s not the best.”

“No, what the heck is it?”

Luke pauses when she stares at him in angry confusion and his face changes from awkward sympathy to an awkward “I-wish-I-was-anywhere-else-but-here” look.

“It’s a… ship name,” he attempts to explain, slow in his hesitation. Jyn blinks. A ship –

“We have a _ship name_?” she bursts out, eyes wide. “Like Brangelina?”

Luke winces, visibly uncomfortable, but nods. “Yup.”

“ _Why_?”

“Well, cause they like you,” he says as if it’s obvious and when she continues to stare at him in horror, he quickly adds. “It’s not a big deal, everyone gets a ship name these days.”

She shakes her head, unconvinced.

“You did this,” she accuses him, and Luke lifts his hands in the air in a sign of innocence.

“Hey, hey, hey, the heart eyes were all you,” he points out, trying to steer the blame off himself.

“There are no heart –,” she begins but stops, knowing that’s a lie. She deflates, her breath rushing out in a defeated whoosh as she admits, “I don’t get why they like us.”

She’s nothing special, and Cassian might be a fairly attractive minor celebrity, but he’s still just the host of a small food show. It was not supposed to gain this much attention, and she’s not sure how it happened. They’re just ordinary people. Shara and Kes don’t get the same publicity – though, of course, they work behind the scenes.

 _So do I,_ Jyn thinks, somewhat bitterly.

“Really?” Luke sounds genuinely surprised. “People love a good romance. Especially when a handsome broody looking guy looks at a girl like she’s the moon and the stars. It’s catchy. You know, the whole will-they-won’t-they?”

Jyn doesn’t even know where to begin with any of that nonsense.

“It’s not a will-they-won’t-they. We’re not – we’re not characters in a television series and this is not a reality show.” She pauses, giving a helpless shrug. “I’m just a cameraman.”

Luke seems sympathetic but he obviously doesn’t know what to say and Jyn doesn’t want comforting words anyway. She gets up, excusing herself from the room, avoiding Cassian’s eyes as they follow her out the door. She spends the night reviewing today’s footage but it turns out to be a mistake as well when all she can see is the rapt attention she films him with. Is it just in her head or can everybody tell how careful she is when she shoots him? Does the admiration drip off the screen like she thinks it does?

Her literal job description is to film him so it’s easy to hide behind that excuse, and yet, everything feels more significant now.

Does he know about the ship name too? Should they talk about it? 

Jyn doesn’t find the answer till morning and she struggles to act like everything is normal during breakfast. Nothing is going to happen between them because they’re still on set, but this invasion of her privacy is only putting a strain on their relationship. Jyn doesn’t even know how to look at him, which he, of course, notices.

He pulls her aside a few minutes before leaving. “What’s wrong?”

She shakes her head, an automatic reaction. “Nothing.”

It’s a feeble lie, and he watches her, trying to decide how much he can push. She knows he doesn’t want to be intrusive but he looks troubled, confused. The question on his lips turns into a sigh, and he settles for saying, “I’m sorry if anything yesterday made you uncomfortable. If you want me to back off, just say so and –”

“It’s not that,” she interrupts, not wanting to hear him apoligize when it isn’t really his fault. They’re both victims of this social media fiasco. “It’s… Do you know about the –”

“Hey, Jyn, Cassian!” It’s Shara, calling for them from the entrance. “Let’s go.”

Jyn gives Cassian a tight smile and follows after Shara. He’s not far behind.

* * *

Draven has pre-picked a restaurant near Kalemegdan, and the filming is routine now. Cassian narrates the intro, explaining how Serbian cuisine has developed from history, particularly Ottoman, Austro-Hungarian, and Balkan influences, and describing how their dishes are heavy with meat, spices, and local vegetables. Cassian tries ćevapi, one of the national dishes: small sausage-like grilled portions of meat, made of beef, served five pieces on a plate. It’s accompanied with chopped onions, fries, and a sauce made of red bell peppers called ajvar, which he describes to have a distinct piquant taste. For dessert, he has čupavci, tiny sponge cakes filled with cream, dipped in chocolate, and wrapped in coconut, and it’s clear he finds them great.

Jyn would like to say she’s grown immune to the face he makes when he really enjoys the food he’s eating, because it’s happened often enough, but alas… She eyes Cassian and the copious amount of delicious food. This is definitely a pleasant job. _But try not to zoom on him too much, Jesus Christ._

Finally, he washes it all down with a glass of red wine, exchanging pleasantries with the chef, shaking hands with the owner. Soon, they’re moving onto the last official stage of filming in Serbia: visiting a kafana.

Kafanas are a bit like coffee houses, a bit like bistros, primarily serving coffee and alcoholic beverages, but often light snacks and other food as well. They also feature live music performances, which is a great opportunity to listen to traditional Serbian music with its distinct Slavic and folkloric characteristics.

Turkish coffee is very popular among the locals so Cassian orders that for himself and the rest of the crew. It’s especially strong coffee, traditionally without sugar or milk, and it’s made of finely ground coffee beans boiled in a pot, then served in a cup where the grounds are allowed to settle at the bottom. Its color is a deep brown, almost black, when the waitress serves them, and various members of the crew eye it carefully.

It’s definitely strong, Jyn determines after a sip, a bit like an espresso – though perhaps it’s a little too bitter even for her taste. Cassian seems to enjoy it, but that’s not surprising, since Jyn knows he’s an espresso guy. Luke, on the other hand, has to keep adding sugar until he eventually gives up and declares it undrinkable. Jyn finishes her own and notes with disdain that the grounds do indeed settle at the bottom when she accidentally swallows some, leaving an unpleasant taste in her mouth. At least, it’ll keep them energized for the next couple of hours.

This setting is more casual than the restaurant since the place isn’t reserved just for them, and other guests mingle, curiously watching their ragtag bunch of a crew. Kay is filming the band, while Jyn focuses on Cassian, trying not to feel self-conscious. She’s hesitant to even admire him, unable to get it out of her mind that her desperation is showing on camera. Sure, she can hide behind the lens, but everyone knows her face now. She’s not just the camera girl anymore. It makes her second guess every decision she makes.

Cassian tries to catch her gaze a couple of times after they’re done but she knows better than to have this conversation in public with their friends. She gives him a small smile, hoping it’s reassuring enough, and follows the rest of the crew outside into the drizzly greyness.

They head back to the hotel to drop off the equipment, and Shara and Kes wander off on their own in the name of sightseeing. Jyn watches them for a second, strangely envious of the ease of their developing relationship, of the time they can spend together without overthinking it. Kay suggest they all go explore the city a bit more before tonight, but Cassian taps his arm and shakes his head to signal that Shara and Kes probably want go alone.

“Oh,” Kay says slowly, realization dawning on him. Jyn’s learned that he’s too smart for his own good, but he can be a little inept when it comes to, well, human relationships. Even his friendship with Cassian seems unconventional, though they obviously do care for each other. “I see, so this is like you and Jyn yesterday. I’m not allowed to accompany them because of the romantic nature of their relationship.”

Cassian doesn’t visibly react, though she’s learned to recognize that alone is a reaction from him. She, on the other hand, can’t help the faint blush spreading across her cheeks. So is this why he was flustered yesterday when she mentioned Kay? Had he told him he wanted to be alone with her? Jyn tries not to be, she really does, but she’s secretly pleased with the idea.

“Alright, Kay,” he says instead, probably to appease his friend. “We can go see whatever you want to. Anyone else want to join?”

Jyn considers saying no, not wanting to intrude, but Luke decides to tag along and she doesn’t fancy spending the next few hours alone in bed with her phone, waiting for everyone to get back. Back home, the idea might appeal to her, but one of the perks of this job is experiencing different countries, cities, and cultures, and she doesn’t feel like missing out on it.

So off they go, straight to the Royal compound per Kay’s request. He narrates the whole experience, acting like their own personal tour guide, listing dates, events, and names that mean very little to Jyn. Though some of it he just seems to _know_ , some of it, he’s clearly reading off Wikipedia. He’s factual and to the point, which she can appreciate, but she finds it a little dry, and she decides she prefers Cassian’s descriptive and colorful narrations of food.

He catches her eye every now and then, shooting her small shy smiles and sharing fleeting looks until Kay speaks up and draws their attention again. Jyn feels calmer than before, soothed by Cassian’s patience and tenderness, but the nagging anxiety is there in the back of her mind. She’ll have to sort that out soon and talk to Cassian. Not so much about them but about what everyone expects of them.

Which might just be the more awkward conversation between the two.

The Royal compound consists of two main residences: the Royal Palace and the White Palace. Visitors can also explore the gardens and the Royal Chapel. The Chapel is devoted to Saint Apostle Andrew The First-Called, patron Saint of The Royal Family of Yugoslavia, and attached to the Royal Palace through a colonnade. Outside, it offers a beautiful view to the terraced rose gardens. Inside, the walls are covered with frescoes, apparently made by Russian painters who travelled the land and copied the frescoes of the most famous Serbian medieval monasteries.

That’s as much as Jyn hears of what Kay’s saying when she looks up to the dome and sees a bullet hole in Christ’s forehead. She instinctively stops to gawk at it. Shockingly, it doesn’t destroy the atmosphere, but there’s a hush around the area, visitors lingering in silence, as if they’re witnessing something horrific.

“Oh, yes.” Kay stops beside her, following her gaze up. “The church was repeatedly desecrated during the Communist era. This is one of its… indiscretions. It’s a powerful sight, isn’t it?”

Jyn nods, still staring up. Crucified and shot in the head, though the act is meant to be sacrilegious, they truly made a martyr out of Jesus.

The Royal Palace leaps dramatically in style from room to room, exhibiting classical European features and heavy Renaissance elements. The formal entrance hall includes details taken from Serbian medieval art, and the Russian-influenced basement levels include a unique leisure room with a private cinema theatre, billiard tables, and imposing wall patterns. Every portrait tells a story of dynastic squabbles, assassinations, behind-the-scenes plots and scheming.

Meanwhile, the White Palace, designed in neo-Palladian style and decorated with Georgian and 19th century Russian antiques, is home to the collection of paintings created by Prince Paul of Yugoslavia. The collection features paintings by Rembrandt, Brueghel, and various other painters. The green and white Sèvres porcelain, purchased by the prince from the Charpentier gallery, are also on display.

There’s a lot to see, a lot of history to explore, and though they don’t go through it all, by the time they’re finished, Jyn’s legs are aching. She wonders how she’s going to make it through tonight, desperately needing a bit of rest. Or maybe she’s just deflecting because she would rather get out of the whole affair, if possible. Which, of course, it isn’t.

Shara makes that very clear when she insists on helping her choose her outfit – though she’s quickly disappointed by the lack of appropriate ones. Eventually, they settle on a dark red top with tight black jeans, eyeliner, and a touch of lipstick. Jyn doesn’t mind occasionally doing her makeup but she feels a bit self-conscious when she looks in the mirror and hates to admit that it’s because of Cassian. She doesn’t want to care if he’ll find her attractive or not but she does. Stupidly, she does.

She pulls her hair into a high ponytail, letting her bangs frame her face, and smooths out her shirt. She can practically feel Shara smirking at her from behind but she ignores it, grabs her jacket, and turns to her. “Let’s go.”

* * *

Though it’s only a little after eight, the bar they settle on is already crowded with loud drunken customers and Jyn cringes at the thought of spending the whole night in the noisy, smoky atmosphere. Luckily, they snatch a table in the back where it’s a little quieter and secluded, and if Jyn _accidentally_ ends up sitting next to Cassian, she’s not complaining.

He went quiet when he saw her at the hotel and she tries not to dwell on that reaction too much. He’s a hard person to read, having an almost perfect poker face, but she thinks it was a good one. She thinks his eyes went a little darker as they ran down her frame, and she thinks he saw her mutter something under his breath. She definitely felt a little twinge in her stomach when he swallowed.

With him sitting next to her, so close, it’s hard to forget that, hard to ignore his clean scent and inviting warmth. The way he looks at her from the corner of his eye does not help, the intensity of his stare taking her breath away. She tries very hard not to fidget.

Kay orders beer, Luke goes for some fancy cocktail, and the rest of them go straight to the hard stuff. Jyn tries something called Pelinkovac, a herbal liquor based on wormwood, which turns out to be incredibly bitter and incredibly strong, and Cassian opts for the national drink, Šljivovica, a type of strong brandy made of plum. He winces, too, after taking a sip and they share a sympathetic glance as they both put down their glasses. She likes the hard stuff but the herbal taste is overwhelming and the aftertaste is not too pleasant. Plus, she doesn’t find it a wise idea to get too drunk tonight. Not with Cassian sitting next to her.

Not with him looking so sharp and handsome in his simple blue button-down, warm eyes, and dark hair that looks soft and touchable.

Jyn takes a deep breath to repress her longing. This is going to be a long damn night.

* * *

She doesn’t know whose brilliant idea it is to play Never have I ever like a group of middle schoolers but she’s informed that it’s happening when she comes back from her bathroom break an hour later. Jyn keeps the complaints to herself, knowing it’s futile to protest, but glares hard enough each round that her indignation is obvious.

Funnily, Kay is doing the same thing – and Cassian seems very amused by this as he looks between the two of them. Jyn fights the urge to roll her eyes. So Cassian likes sarcastic introverted killjoys. Big deal.

“Never have I ever shoplifted,” Kay says, somewhat reluctantly, when it’s his round. Jyn awkwardly drinks and looks fiercely around the table to mask her embarrassment, daring them to make a comment. To her relief, Shara takes a shot too, and they share a conspiratorial smile.

 “Never have I ever had a paranormal experience,” Kes says.

Luke drinks.

“Oh, come on,” Kay scoffs, his voice much less formal than Jyn’s used to.

“Hey, listen, ghosts are real!” Luke declares, Kay’s mouth twitches, Cassian groans, and the two of them launch into an argument about whether or not ghosts are real. Everyone else refuses to take sides and Jyn hopes this little distraction will end the stupid game but Shara steers them back on course and says, “Never have I ever looked through someone’s phone.”

Over the next thirty minutes, they learn that Shara had a crush on her friend’s father in high school, Kes has been arrested, Luke sings in the shower, Cassian has never seen an episode of Gilmore Girls, (“A tragedy!” Shara cries, and even Jyn has to agree) Kay has never cried at a movie, and none of them have ever fallen in love at first sight. (“That would be highly improbable anyway,” Kay says, matter-of-factly, “as it is not a real thing.”)

As they get more drunk, the questions, predictably, grow more sexual (they also find out that none of them have ever made a sex tape but most of them have taken nudes, and honestly, Jyn could have lived without that information – especially about Cassian, because _fuck_ , but that’s not the point) and Jyn is eager to finally end the game before it gets even more embarrassing.

“Okay, last round,” Shara concedes and nods towards Luke to finish his turn.

“Never have I ever…” He looks around, glances in the direction of Shara and Kes, then Jyn and Cassian, “had a crush on a co-worker.”

Her sigh of relief turns out to be premature. Jyn barely holds in a pained groan. This is ridiculous, she laments, but takes the shot and gulps it down, because what’s the point in lying? Shara, Kes, and yes, even Cassian, follow her example. Seeing him take the shot is a little exhilarating. She catches his eye for a second, and there it is, the same look he had when he saw her at the hotel.

She swallows. Oh, hell. How is she going to go several more weeks without kissing him, knowing he feels the same?

Cassian gives her a gentle shy smile as they continue to gaze at each other and the rest of the world falls away. He’s so close and she’s leaning a little bit up, straining towards him, straining to be in his orbit. She feels intoxicated.

Lost in the moment, she doesn’t notice Luke fiddling with his phone until he’s already taken the photo. At the click, Jyn snaps her eyes to him, a flush of embarrassment coloring her cheeks at being caught staring at Cassian like a lovesick schoolgirl. ( _“Heart eyes,”_ Luke said.)

But she quickly grows angry. After the ship name, after the comments, the notifications, the freaking trailer, she’s run out of her patience. She’s tired of being ignored when she says enough.

“Hey, Luke,” she calls to him, a challenge in her voice. She’s practically vibrating in anger, itching for a fight. “Seriously?”

“Sorry,” he winces, holding his hands up in surrender. “But it’s such a good picture, look.”

He turns his phone towards them and Jyn angrily skims it. She’s too embarrassed to think it’s good: she’s tilting her head up at Cassian, blinking up at him with bright eyes and a soft expression, watching him like he’s the most beautiful person she’s ever seen. (He might very well be.)

She hasn’t realized she was so obvious. Her face is basically an open book. She can’t even analyze Cassian’s expression, too caught up in how she’s _looking_ at him.

She pulls away, averting her gaze. Breaking Luke’s phone would be too strong, not to mention, very rude. She can deal with this like a rational human being.

“Luke,” Cassian starts but Jyn doesn’t want to hear it, whatever he’s going to say, almost too scared to hear his opinion.

She shakes her head. “I'm gonna go back to the hotel. Kinda tired.”

Shara calls after her and Luke apologizes again but she’s already out the door, a gust of cool air hitting her. She takes deep breaths, trying to let it clear her head, calm her racing heart.

“Jyn!”

The familiar voice halts her in her steps, body still tense. Cassian. She turns around, eyeing him warily.

He holds himself a little hesitantly, shoulders hunched. “Can I… walk you back?”

Well. Normally, she’d say no, stew in her anger alone, but… She knows they have to discuss this at some point.

She nods, still too wound up to speak, and he breathes a sigh of relief.

“Sorry about that,” he says as he jogs up to her and falls in line beside her. “I know it can be a lot. You shouldn’t have to deal with it.”

“How do you deal with it?” she asks curiously, because for an ex-actor and television show host, he is rather private and mysterious.

“Mostly by ignoring it.”

Yeah, she wishes she could. People butting into her personal life always did get her hackles raised, and now it’s a whole bunch of strangers on the internet. She envies him for being able to ignore it.

But then a wry smile twists his mouth and he admits, “It used to be easier.”

She doesn’t know what to make of that. “This is not easy?”

“This is different,” he says, his gaze lingering on her.

 _Because of me?_ she wonders, unable to ask it. The look in his eyes is answer enough, and Jyn begins to think that maybe she’s not the only open book when it comes to each other.

She walks with a little more confidence after that.

* * *

They don’t make it back to the hotel. Somehow, they end up at the riverside again, the lights of the city dancing across the body of water like hundreds of tiny shimmering diamonds. Jyn admires the illuminating sight, letting the peace of the moment wash over her. They stand next to each other in companionable silence, so close, their hands are almost touching.

She thinks about reaching out, slipping her fingers into his, but she doesn’t want to disturb the tentative peace between them. She feels his hand twitching next to hers, and she knows he’s thinking the same.

She glances at him sideways, feeling brave enough to finally ask what’s bothering her the most.

“Do you think they’re ruining it?” Cassian gives her a quizzical look and she struggles to clarify, not sure how to put her thoughts into words. They swirl wildly in her head, then slip through her fingers like sand when she opens her mouth. “I mean, for God's sake, the fans even gave us a ship name!”

“A what now?”

“Nevermind.” She shakes her head. If he doesn’t know, she doesn’t want to be the one to explain it.

But he seems to catch onto what she’s trying to say and he stops to consider it, chewing on her words. Tentatively, he begins, “I don’t know. Does this... change how you feel?”

“I – no.” She shakes her head again. She knows it doesn’t. “But...” 

“But it’s pressuring.”

“Yeah,” she breathes out, relieved he’s kind of getting it. “Exactly.”

Hands shoved into her pockets, she looks down, scuffing her feet with the other. She can feel Cassian watching her.

“It,” she stops, swallows, tries to force the words out, one by one if she has to, “makes me..” _self-conscious,_ “second guess everything.”

He reaches out, gently tugging on the sleeves of her jacket until her hand falls out of her pocket and tangles with his. She knows the gesture is supposed to be reassuring but her heart jumps at the contact. His eyes search hers.

“You know I don’t expect anything from you. Even when this is over, if you don’t want to… well, that’s okay.”

She gives him a tiny grateful smile, eyes falling to their entwined hands between them. She caresses his thumb with her own, experimenting, and delights in his small intake of breath.

“I know this is probably selfish,” she begins, “given how much attention it’s bringing the show… but I’d really prefer to stay in the background. Maybe tone back the social media presence a little. You know?”

It’s just as much for her sake as for whatever relationship is forming between her and Cassian. Because she does want that date when this is over. She doesn’t want it to be ruined before it even starts.

Cassian nods, understanding. “I’ll do my best to rein in the others. Though you don’t really need my help. I think you unintentionally frightened Luke for life,” he says, a teasing smile playing on his lips.

She lets out a surprised laugh, brightened by his joke. “That? That was nothing. He’s lucky I know he means well.”

Cassian grins and Jyn automatically mirrors him, thinking that he should do that more often. It’s a great look.

A very great look, she decides, watching him from the corner of her eyes as they begin walking again. They don’t let go of each other’s hands.

* * *

It’s late by the time they get back. They stay out until the fireworks and watch them illuminate the dark sky in shades of gold, blue, and red. At the hotel, Cassian walks her to the room she shares with Shara like he’s walking her to the door of her apartment after a date. They look at each other, pausing, both a little unwilling to end the night – but they can’t stand here in the hallway forever, and Jyn can hear Shara moving inside. She doesn’t want to get interrupted.

“Well…”

“Well,” he echoes and her lips twist into a small smile. “Goodnight.”

Still, they stand staring at each other, fidgeting, waiting for… something. Not wanting to be the first to move.

Cassian hesitates, contemplating something, dark eyes boring into hers. There’s a restless energy surrounding him as he almost bounces on his feet. Jyn is about to question him when the wrinkles around his eyes smooth out, his mind made up. He wets his lips – oh, that is just unfair.

“Goodnight,” he repeats, and leans down towards her.

For a split second, she thinks he’s going to kiss her and her heart runs wild with the thought. But he merely presses his lips to her cheek, soft, warm, a little shy. She gasps in surprise. This close, she’s wrapped up in him, in the way he smells and feels, making her a little lightheaded, making her ache for more.

Just cuddling with him might be nice, she thinks, and it’s such an innocent thought that it scares her. It wasn’t supposed to be this deep.

He pulls away, his gaze questioning. She knows her cheeks are burning but she smiles, a little shaky, a silent answer to his unspoken question. _Yes, it’s okay to do that._

Even if it makes her legs feel like jelly.

He moves away, giving her one last glance before he disappears into his own room. Then she slumps against the door, taking a moment to collect herself, regulate her breathing, calm her beating heart. She’s not sure if she’s relieved or disappointed that he didn’t kiss her, or if it’s possible to be both. It’s for the best, she knows, but it’s harder and harder to remember that.

Inside, she falls on her mattress in a trance, barely noticing Shara on the other bed as she replays the last few minutes.

“Girl, you got it bad,” Shara quips helpfully, and instead of the familiar teasing tone, she sounds genuine.

Which makes it all the worse because she’s right and Jyn can’t argue so she doesn’t.

“Shut up,” she mumbles without heat, her mind still stuck on Cassian standing so close to her in the hallway, his lips against her cheek, his warmth and scent surrounding her.

She’s so so fucked.

* * *

Kes seems to be the only one hungover in the morning, and he’s gloomy the entire time they pack their stuff, preparing to leave, which Shara seems to find both amusing and endearing. Luke, on the other hand, is awkward and timid around her, and Jyn doesn’t want to have bad blood between them but feels justified in her outburst last night. To her relief, he approaches her on his own after breakfast, slowly, like a puppy with his tail between his legs.

“I’m sorry, Jyn,” he says, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.”

She knows that, knows it’s his job to take pictures and advertise and take care of their social media accounts, and she can’t expect him not to, but she has to set some boundaries at some point. A little privacy, that’s all she wants.

“I just thought we were there to have fun,” she explains, shrugging. “Not working.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll delete it, if you want.”

In that moment, she catches Cassian’s eyes behind Luke’s shoulders, watching them curiously, and she thinks, _it really was a good picture._ She shakes her head.

“No. Just don’t post it.”

Jyn pats his shoulder in a gesture of goodwill, then makes her way towards Cassian who silently hands her a cup of coffee. Strong, dark, with a hint of sugar; just how she likes it. She smiles into her cup. The touch of his lips on her cheek still burns in her memory as she blinks up at him, and she knows it’ll be a long time before she can stop thinking about it.

From the twinkle in his eyes, he feels the same.

**Author's Note:**

> If you think Jyn's coffee preference isn't a metaphor for Cassian, you're wrong.
> 
> That aside, Jyssian is a ship name I really really don't like but I couldn’t figure out how to use Rebelcaptain in this context. I obsessed over it for days, it drove me up the wall. But here we are.
> 
> I obviously made some throwbacks to previous chapters, and I imagine the people reading this have most likely read those as well but just for reference: Mara and the lucky dick comment happens in the previous installation by imsfire, Bodhi and Luke talking online is mentioned way back in the first part by Moonprincess92, Jyn and Cassian sleeping in each other's room happens in Belgium by Dopt, and Cassian admits he likes Jyn in guineapiggie's chapters.
> 
> Thank you for reading! You can find me on [tumblr](http://captainandors.tumblr.com/)


End file.
